Terrariums: A Houseplant for Houseplant Serial Killers

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When first started keeping them, I did not have the best luck with houseplants. I over watered them. I under watered them. I completely forgot about their existence. I’ve murdered more plants than I care to admit. That is, until I met the terrarium.  Terrariums are perfect if you are short on space or time or nurturing abilities. 

Literally Immortal

Plus, you can put awesome tiny stuff in a terrarium.  Like book-browsing dinosaur/dragons.  The creature pictured below is the result of a request to do “a dinosaur.” It’s more of a dragonasaurus.

This Dragonasaurus and his terrarium home now reside in an Elementary school library, where he delights and inspires wee children daily.

I recommend succulents. And moss. Both require only the occasional spritz of water.  I have used chicken and hens in this terrarium, some found moss, and some crazy alien plant that was growing in my mother’s succulent garden. She has no idea what it is either. 

Pictured: Strange Spindly Alien Plant

To put together a terrerium, you just need a few things:

• Rocks, pebbles, or marbles (basically anything for drainage on the bottom.)

• Sphagnum Moss (you can get this at pet stores, but it's much cheaper at a Home Depot or Lowes)

• Plants

• Dirt

• A Glass Container 

Just layer rocks, moss, dirt, then plants into your container. You can't mess it up. If you do...I don't even know. I guess, take a minute to ask yourself why Mother Nature has such a beef with you.

Lots of different plants do good. Again I like the succulents because they are colorful and strange and pretty dang hard to kill. 

This is a great guide for planning, planting, and maintaining terrariums: http://extension.missouri.edu/p/g6520 It also has a good list of stuff that will grow in a terrarium. And it's put out by Mizzou-- thanks, old friend.

Taadaa! A Terrerium. Enjoy and leave a comment!

Oh My, Chocolate Pie!

When people say “it’s easy as pie” they mean this specific pie. This pie is easy because it is basically just pudding. So people should really start saying “it’s easy as pudding” It has a ring to it, I think.

Why, that's just easy as puddin'!

This comes from a family cookbook and is titled “Chloe’s Chocolate Pie”. Chloe is a relative of mine (a great aunt, I think—I'm never sure, I've got a lot of relatives.) and happens to be her late 90’s.  Clearly she is living proof that chocolate pie is the secret to longevity. 

Fountain of Youth

You could put this pie into any pie crust, but I made an Oreo Crust (recipe below) and topped it with homemade whipped cream and some chocolate shavings for extra yums.

Chloe's Chocolate Pie

• 1 Cup Sugar

• 3 Cups Milk

• 1/4 Cup Corn Starch (I've used flour before, though it's not advisable, unless you're into runny pie)

• 1/4 Cup Cocoa

• 3 Eggs, Beaten (The original recipe says "3 Each Eggs, Beaten"--who knows what that means?)

• 1 Teaspoon Vanilla

Put all ingredients in a pan (except vanilla, save that for the very end or you'll cook the flavor out) and bring to a boil on top of the stove. Stirring constantly (No, really, stuff gets...lumpy...fast). When thickened, pour into a prepared pie shell. 

Oreo Pie Crust

• 24 Oreo cookies
• 1/4 Cup Melted Butter

(It's not exactly health food)

Food process your Oreos and mix with the butter.  Press mixture into pie pan and chill for about an hour.

Once you've poured the pie in, I'd chill the whole shebang for a bit, so it'll slice better. Be warned: It is pretty rich. Like fall-into-a-sugar-coma rich. So, eat up and plan recuperation time accordingly.

Maple Monday

Meet Maple.

Picture courtesy of my talented photographer sister.

Maple is my hairy child. She is the reason that many of my crafts are doggie-centric. She is very mannerly, but you’ll find that lots of my pictures have a paw or nose poking in; she isn’t big on personal space.

Now this post isn’t really about Maple, but she is the featured model in some of the pictures, and, well it's Monday and I couldn’t resist the alliteration.

Here is the real project:

Dog Biscuit Bed

A Dog Biscuit Bed. It's made using the exact same process as yesterday’s Biscuit Quilt. Just added a little puffy border on three sides. 

She's definitely only doing this for a piece of string cheese. 

Clearly, Maple is a bit too big for this bed, which I sold on Etsy to a very cozy litter of French Bulldogs (well their person--French Bulldog puppies rarely have their own Palpay accounts). 

Imagine it filled with puppies. Overwhelming cuteness.

Hope you liked it! Merry Maple Monday!

All I Really Need to Know I Learned from PBS Quilting Shows

Ok, maybe not everything. But some pretty good stuff. Like this:

Biscuit-y Goodness

A biscuit quilt!  At least that’s what the PBS ladies called it. I’ve been seeing them on Esty as “puffy quilts”.  “Biscuit” is clearly better and more delicious sounding. 

Does not smell or taste like real biscuits. Sorry.

 

I made this quilt for my brand new niece, Miss Avery. The sassy patterned fabric you see is “Baby Genuis” by Benartex. Supposedly its good for baby brains. Also, what fun to squeeze the little pillow puffs with those new fancy things you've discovered called hands!

By the time you are done with a biscuit quilt it’ll be sorta heavy, so it’s really more like a baby placemat, than a wrap-up blanket.

Baby Placemat.  

And you'll want to tie-quilt it in some fashion. I used a fluffy yarn. Just remember, the thicker the yarn, the harder it will be to pull the needle through.

Fluffy Yarn Tied Back

Now, I won't tell you that biscuit quilts are easy or fast. They are definitely time consuming and kinda hard on your hands, from squeezing pillows tight enough to sew them together. But overall they are way worth it. People and babies everywhere will be impressed! Try one for yourself. If you want specific instructions, there are several good tutorials around.

Here's one: http://danandtes.blogspot.com/2011/10/puff-quilt-tutorial-for-beginners.html

Introductions Are In Order

Have you ever watched Martha Stewart (God bless her crafty soul) throw together the perfect wreath made of, say cranberries or some nonsense, in 5 minutes wearing all white and having produced no mess what-so-ever? Do people on television create stuff in some sort of mess-free vacuum? Defying the laws of nature, wherein mess-matter simply vanishes? 

Unnatural Tidiness.

I'm Becca and here at Crafts of Mass Destruction, well, things are a little different. Seemingly tidy projects magically produce massive destruction. Sew a button on? EF5 Tornado of thread hits home. Sit down to paint small object? Emerge looking like Jackson Pollack painting. Bake a cake? Scrape frosting off every single surface of kitchen. You get the idea.

The effects of crafting on what was once my couch.

Crafts are about to get real, folks. So join me as catalog my projects (and sometimes the messes)!

Cheers,
Becca